coloringbooksblue.........

AMERICANS: We are tired of struggling in a country where we have so much, yet give our people so little. Budget cuts are being made everywhere. We are less and less: FOR THE PEOPLE, BY THE PEOPLE, it is not about the people anymore, just like T.V. isn't about Quality only ratings. This is my space, this is my quality, hopes, fears, and dreams, my stories I share with you.

Monday, February 28, 2005

Lets just blurt it all OUT!!!!!!!!! Scream!!! Ok, now I feel better.

If anything is going on I feel like I'm just getting more on the edge of things. I know that's nothing anyone wants to hear. I went to my classes today, and math went ok. It was my Linguistics class that angered me. I got back my response paper and instead of the usual 9/10 or even the 10/10 that I'd hoped for after working so hard on it, 8/10 it disgusts me! We went over our review for the mid-term which is this coming Monday. This whole college thing seems like a setup. ha ha ha. 1. They set you up to take a big chunk of your income. 2. Those living on campus whose mommy and daddy aren't paying are getting jiped on the nasty cafeteria food. I hear it keeps getting worse. 3. The Professors think there class is the only one you have. 4. Those who must work have an almost non-existant social life if any. 5. The stress it creates reaks havic on your body. 6. Those who can't afford health insurance suffer from it greatly. 7. All the student loans you have to pay back, even if you paid for most of it yourself. 8. The idea that the one job you are qualified for will actually be available to you when you graduate.
I will continue college, it just seems a very risky situation, just as risky as not going and working at Mcdonalds, or a Power Plant, you still have no health insurance, must eat crappy food in order to get by and pay rent, and you still get treated like crap, I will admit sometimes worse then those Profs. I just feel that we are as human beings set up for failure unless we are given the inate ability to solve mathamatical problems and do exceptionaly well in science. If you can't get through math, you might as well cry. la la haha. I'm trying to blow off steam. I have to study sometime today. I hope that gets done.
I"m sorry if I offend anyone, but this is how I deal with my stress, it keeps me sance. If I could make money complaining I'd be a millionair right now. Then I would give money to the poor, or at least good charities, I just can't see how people who have lots n lots of money keep it all for themselfs. I would invest it and give back to the community, but I don't have a million dollars yet. I still try to give back though anyway.
Don't you wish everyone was so nice?
I think everyone deserves a small house, a piece of land, a decent job, and children at least one. We need to start giving each other a hand up, not a hand down like all these dirty politicans!!!!!!!! I so wish I could start a REVOLUTION like the Beatles only sing about. It's a dream I have had for a couple of years now.
Well my train of thought has been interupted, TTFN ta ti for now.
ARCaDiA

Friday, February 25, 2005

There's always tommorrow, or so they say

I was right about my math test a big whopping 69%. So I keep telling myself that the semester isn't over yet. I have three more tests left and a project on a book called "Math Curse". I hope that those things will save me. I have a mid-term coming up in LInguistics, so study time!I even worked on my paper for that class today. I"m not to thrilled about tommorrow I was suppose to get together with some friends to finish my math homework, but I have work til 8pm. I just found that out tonight, yuck. One of the girls I have class with says she'll help me on Monday before class. Adios for now.

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

"Garden State" a must see!

Today really sucked. I"m listening to Sara Mchlachlan, she helps bring me back down to earth at times like this. I just went to work after my awful test, and the sadness I felt after I knew I failed my test. It wasn't like I didn't study either. It just happened. I hate it that she doesn't give us information that is in the book. It's like here it is on the board, take the notes and make sure you understand it, you don't need to practice it. She dosen't know or care how much this all means to me. All my life I have been trying to hard to succeed, and now this again "math" has come to haunt me. I tell myself i have a mant who loves me, great family who love me, but it still hurts.
As for linguistics I got a pass on my introduction to my paper. Yipeee... :( What good will it do me, if I can't pass math?
Anyway I rented "Garden State" I so needed to veg, but this movie only got me more emotional. It is wonderful, simple, and beautiful. I love the music, the actors, everything. That's all I am going to say because I don't want to ruin it. It definetly inspired me, like a good song. Chicago, still haven't watch it yet, so I am taking a break from that gosh darn awful stuff that makes me feel like a pea next to a giant building.It's how those above me look down at me, and I am trying to break free, to better myself and escape this lame existance. Not that money solves everyones problems, it just helps.
I found a dress I realyu like . I think I am going to buy it tommorrow. It's for something real special, I never wear dresses.
"Spend all your time waiting for that a second chance for a break that would make it ok, there's always some reason to feel not good enough and it's hard at the end of the day, I need some distraction ooo beautiful release memories seep from my vains let me be empty ohh and weightless and maybe I'll find some peace tonight in the arms of the angels fly away from here......" (Sara Mchlachlan's Angel)

Friday, February 18, 2005

Another Math test.

Hope I pass....
Lots to do this weekend.
This will be my only post until I am free
Free from work
Can't wait til spring break
nothing dazling to report.
I am reporting on gender and Language...
a wonderful curious paper
why do we act like we do
why are men so domineering?
They like to lead
we follow
or so says linguistic.
adios for now

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Papers, papers, and more PaPers.....

OK so now what do I do? I have so many choices for my linguistics paper just spinning in my head. My questions is which subject will best suit me, and be the most simplistic, well yah easy to get an A. Ha ha. yeah. I really want to do my paper on Spanglish ,but will there be enough information out there to supply me with the numbr of Pages I need. I've also looked at using the gender issue, how men and women communicate differently with language. Then there is the factoid that bilingual edu. in schools is not working. Spanglish stands out the most, but It doesn't mean it's the answer to my problems with chosing the correct subject to do a literary anaylisis on. If anyone has the answers, or even ideas please comment on this bloggin, blog..
Maybe I"ll have the answers tommorrow. A rainbow in the dark is never found without the light.

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

Mis spelled Words

To all of those who hate mispelled workds I apoligize, but my computer sucks. yea I know this is a lame excuse, but it isi true. I tried to go back and edit my blog to correct my mispelled words, but it did not work. I refuse to totally delete a perfectly good journal because of mistakes. Remember Life is about making mistakes and learning from them. I hope that I will learn how to become a better speller and typer from this LOL :) so please bear with me, ha ha.
;O) Waiting for the day when everything connects, no more will I have to wait for the right job, right home, thank heavens I have a good man.

Thank goodness for little mistakes

I did find that calculator! Ahhh it was sitting in my living room chair. I'm such a freak, thank god for small favors. I am getitng somewhere now with lingusitics, but find myself falling behind in math. It's not that i don't understand it. I need to start the homework from 2.3-3.2 and work on it this weekend. It's going to be like 40 problems , but I need to at least go through one si aknow will be on the test. this is gonna be my caught up weekend. I also have to finish my proposal for my linguistics paper. I should know my topic by tommorrow. We are going to discuss our idea's in class. I hope this will help me choose a subject on linguistics to study. I want to do slang. I want to find out how it first started if that is even possible. I also have a few other idea's in my noets. I can't remember them now though. V-day was nice!!! I chopped my hair off in a cute bob, straightened it, yahh finally straight hair, I love it. My Fox bought me Punky Brewster season two, and we took out my good friend for her b-day, 21!! She didn't really get to hammered just a little drunk. I don't drink much so I had malt drink and that was it for me. We also went to the Casino and I made my ten dollars into twenty!!! TTFNA...........

Monday, February 14, 2005

This is just hunky Dory!!!!

ok so last night I put my calculator in my bag for college. Then I get to school today planning on working on homework. I take out my cell phone from my bag and put it in my pocket. I then zip my bag up take my books out of the large compartment to study. So I go over my notes like usual. My friends show up and we go to another room to study. Anyway when I get to class I go to get my calculator out and it is gone!!!!!!!!!!! The only way it could be gone is if someone took it out of my bag. It is so annoying that so many people are so nasty as to take someone else's property, especially when your poor like me. I mean I had nice plans for v-day, but my money might be spent on a new ass calculator for college. My friend pam looked at my house for it for me. She could not find it, and I have no clue otherwise how it could have gotton out of my bag without someone removing it. I have had it with our society, our world, they are all a bunch of money hungry fens who only care for themselves, few of them would turn in something so precious to a college student. So that is how my valentines day is going so far. Bah humbug.

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Disconnected Daze.....

Instead of La La as Ashley Simpson would say, I feel blah blah.....
I was going to write a lot today, but my mind is blank. The few thoughts I have had skipped down the street into my home and out the door. My brain is inoperative at this current time. My only thoughts are of sleep, food, and soothing music. A ha soothing music sounds a bit funny since I find Abra Moore, and Avril Levine soothing. Today nothing has come together in the correct manner, except maybe math. :) My hours of studying are starting to pay off besides learning an important skill of function notation. This to anyone else probably seems silly being that this math is simplistic for many.
Blah blah blah blah blah.....
Does anyone listen?
Arcadia is a Greek word, meaning the beginning of happiness.... A good friend told me that.

Friday, February 04, 2005

mATH? sMART? mE? mAYBE.

oK gUYS TOdaY i ACtUCALLY am passing math with a B! I have never gotton a B in math in my entire school/collge career so now if I can only keep it til the end of my semester it would be axsome. I have a lot more work a head of me, waiting in my book bagget!!!:)
So my day was eventful as far as math goes. If you are looking for a poem I don't hacve any. You'll have to wait until I'm either depressed or a light comes on in my brain. Right now all that light wants to do is veg and watch t.v. whichs is very bad for college. Bad, ARCARDIA bad! I should be doing homework, not typing on this computer!!!! ahh, but I do need a life outside of school not that any of our college professors think this. They believe homework is your life.
Cherio'

Thursday, February 03, 2005

Another day, full of sunshine!

Well I stayed up real late last night hoping to get a chance to watch a movie. I ended up on the internet all night trying to print out free valentine cards. I hate my computer at home. I have got to get it fixed someday soon. All my friends lately have been ditching me, or to busy. It kind of sucks, but I understand. It is gonna be a tough semeser for me too. I still have to start studying that math tonight, and I want to freak my english teacher out! I really want ten out of ten on my next response paper. So I am gonna have to put in more time this weekend. ahhhh I have a party to go to, but there is only four of us, no one else could show. I hope that it won't be lame, no alcohol my lads, just lots of games like uno, and laughter would be nice to calm my nerves. I would also like to get Pizza sometime, hmmm I love pizza, and it's sooo bad for you!!! Other then that not much is going on. It's pretty pathetic, I want to watch riding bullets, a new movie of Stephan King. I'm a big fan even though I didn't mention him in my profile I don't think. He is such a cool Guy, love his stories. I haven't read a good book of his in like forever.
Well this is boring, maybe I'll have more to write next time. All of you who share my thoughts take Care, adios, hasta luego, Peace!

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

into the darkness

Everyone worries about what other people think of them, it's just the way we are. It's like looking at your college career. You, well at least me, I wonder what the heck happened. I am still in college working my but off, but I feel like i'm no where. I work at a retail shop for goodness sake, I'm not transforming lives in that aspect. Then in math class when I finally feel I am getting somewhere i screw it up! I forget to use the triangular formula, that the prof said it would be on the test. I freak, and use the point formula. I wanted to die. Do you ever wish you had someone you could just complain to, and they would never tire of it. I do, people get tired of hearing negative words, but sometimes you have to expell them, or else it will just explod on someone. This is how I feel about messing up on that math test. You see math and I we are not friends, maybe close to a handshake if I at least pass this test with a 70. I try not to set my goals to high here, I fear the defeat. It's like a booming drum keeping you up late at night from the tenants upstairs. You don't want to tick em off, but you want it to stop!
Everything and nothing is what I am, something people see, view, judge, eliminate from their minds, who wants to become, to be more, still feeling trapped in the cycle of our society. It's flow that controls us, ties us down, with the cycle of life, it needs to be reformed, ask yourself, What is really important?